i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
