He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
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