you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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