Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
