THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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