worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
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she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
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He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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