we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
