It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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