I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize