You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
