They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
