i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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