u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
