Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
