I seem to have left my pride at pride
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
