I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
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As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
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We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..