I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
