Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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