yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize