this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize