she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
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