Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize
