Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
There r osticjed everywhere
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
