gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
