you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
