i don't plan on having that self control this summer
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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