your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
