Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
