you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
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you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
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I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
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