just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I just forgot I was standing up.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
