Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
