did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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