did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
