already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
