I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
