woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
