erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
