another moral hangover. fuck.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
you made out with another girl for some wings
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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