ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
