so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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