My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
