As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
