I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
