I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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