watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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