when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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