I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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