Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Randomize