I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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