do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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